So the last two days have been pretty eventful…some good some not as good. Yesterday was a rough day…the kind of day that makes or breaks a relationship day. We talked. Mostly about how our lives have gotten into a routine and we know what to expect everyday about how there is no spontaneity anymore. July 23 will be our 9 year anniversary – keeping the spark alive is something every couple struggles with – either they decide to part ways because it’s too much work or they stick it out and remember why they fell in love to begin with. Phrases like “want to date other people” and “kids with someone else” and “do you want out” were thrown around. They are questions that we really talked about – we weren’t angry but there were tears. It’s hard to talk about this kind of stuff which is why most of the time it goes unsaid. We spent last night and the day today getting back to the basics and spending some quality time together without distractions – it was wonderful. Working, driving, living and being together can get really…really…really stressful. We have decided also to not spend all our time together on the weekends or at lunch during the week so that we allow us to miss us. I am sure that this will go a long way in rekindling the flame and let us be individuals together again.
June 13, 2009
June 12, 2009
This morning. After 3 weeks of binging and a roller coaster of emotional baggage…I ran. I know people are probably like WTF…you have been doing this since October shouldn’t you be over the surprise “I can do it” by now? Well, that’s my point – the fact that I still give a damn when I am only 3 months shy of being 1 year into my weight loss plan is a huge surprise to me! The fact that somewhere deep inside me I feel that I am worth the struggle…that I haven’t given up on myself yet…it speaks volumes of how much personal growth I have gone through since I started this. I am not the same person anymore… It’s difficult I think for Jo right now because I am changing and she is reacting to the change…sometimes with frustration or anger…not at me but because she doesn’t understand. It has been a rough 3 weeks around here lots of crying and apologies on both sides. Fact is I love her, can’t imagine my life without her, and we will figure this out too…just like everything else.
